Holiday (summer) 2013 - The Faces I shall Miss the Most

It has been 2 years since I have been back to the UK & am very much looking forward to it.

There is much to look forward to.

But, there are some faces I shall miss whilst we are away.

Ollie, this is your moment.
Finally, you get to be in charge.
If you can stay awake long enough.

PS Being in charge STILL doesn't mean you can wee on everything

Leah, (Princess Shiny-Bum) enjoy your rest.
We've got some work to do when I get back.

Ming. Lovely snuffly, not always appreciated for your looks Ming.
Keep snoozin' & sunbathin'

Our beautiful Blanche, unchecked, please shout as you see fit, at anything on the tv that vexes you:
Tennis
Golf
Dragons
Villains (you decide who they are)
Guys with beards (see above)
The News (specifically civil unrest around the world)
Skylanders

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I am the Elephant (wo)Man

Perhaps the lady in the pharmacy would approve?
(I was being a lady ninja, fyi)

Off we went, all together, to see Monsters University.
To celebrate the End (of the School Year).
It was sold out.

(none of this is relevant but I thought I'd set the scene)

*****************************************************************************
On the way back to the car, we pop into a pharmacy for travel staples before our holiday. Paracetemol, that kind of thing.

A member of staff gave me a good look when we came in &, is now following me around the shop trying to attract my attention.

"Excuse me, madam."

"Yes?"

"I want to show you our products. To help you.  You know, with your face. *points at my face*"

Tone was:

a) I'm so sorry for all that you have had to endure. This terrible affliction you have borne. Y'know, with your face & everything.
b) But it's all going to ok now, sweetie, 'cos I got a cream to sort it all out.  You need be a monster no more.

I have freckles.  Sun freckles. Some patches of hyper-pigmentation.  Some.

I don't love it & it has come with age (& not helped by 9 years of living in the desert) but, meh.

Slap a bit of BB Cream on it, feel a bit less self-conscious about it & off we go for some fun.

Grrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr, Lady, if I wanted your opinion I would have asked for it. 
AND however, brave I may be sounding you are making feel like shite & really rather self-conscious. 

I mean, do my nearest & dearest have to fight waves of revulsion & nausea when I turn up?

Anyway,
she's STILL standing in front of me. 
Maybe she's waiting for me to collapse with relief that someone is able to relieve me of this freckly nightmare?

This lady knows the secret escape from the freckly 10th Circle of Dante's Inferno.

I respond  "Wow. How rude."

Trousers is sniggering cos I've told him this sort of thing happens.  He thought I was exaggerating. He can see the ridiculousness of the situation.  He thinks it is ludicrous, cos I'm gorgeous (blahblahblah)


"Yes," she says "very sorry.  It's over here."

"No thanks. I'm good."

"We have many things to help you, madam. Peels, masks, creams, face-lift products."

*OMFG, Lady, please. Stop.*

No.
THANK.

YOU.

Should have asked her why she hadn't availed herself of those 'Make You 2 Feet Taller & Not So Fat' pills over there.

Waving a flag for the Asian/European Tribe

Book I am reading at the moment frequently mentions Eurasian & Anglo-Indians during the time of the British Raj.

Apparently, Eurasian originally referred to Anglo-Indians whereas I think in the last, say 40-50 years it refers to those of mixed Far-East Asian & European ancestry.

Made me contemplate my own racial status. 
********************************************************************************

Contemplation done.  Conclusion reached. 

********************************************************************************
Being mixed-race is a blessing.

Proud as hell of my Mum & Dad
(granted The Scowl might be misleading)

(A few years later - Scowl Absentia)

Although, to be fair, being any race is a blessing.  So, no great revelation there.

But, for a while there, if you are of mixed-race, there are moments when you aren't really sure where you are 'meant' to fit in.

As a child, way back when, there were moments when it was a little difficult, being different.

Of course, NOW Big Girl Roo realises that EVERYBODY is different & everybody had 'difficult moments'.

In fact, it is the very thing that makes us the same.

Pfft.  Big deal. nothing special about you, kiddo....

.... 'cos guess what? at the exact same time you think you are being all different & better put The Smiths on, other kids were feeling different too.  Their parents may have been splitting up, perhaps they had weight issues (up or down), skin issues, learning difficulties, didn't have a Walkman (I'm dating myself, aren't I?), had Betamax while everyone else had the other thing (Stop it. You are working out how old I am right now, aren't you?!?!), blah blah blah.

The early part of Secondary School had crappy times, the name-calling "hey chinky", "oi, fish-lips" and the, what I think is a unique HK school word (at the time anyway) "hey, choge" was upsetting but it passed.  Other kids were teased for stutters or acne so again, it was no different to that.

I don't recall how or why it suddenly stopped but it did & school was a very happy time for me.  Socially.  Academically, that's a different story &, not one we are telling now. 

On reflection,
*  attending family Hungry Ghost dinners (when it seemed no-one else you knew had to. They were, btw.  I just didn't know) at PorPor's flat,
A bit about Hungry Ghosts

*  being an already self-conscious 13 yr old & enduring inquisitive looks at the Aberdeen cemetery every Grave-Sweeping (Ching Ming) holiday,
A bit about Ching Ming (Grave Sweeping)

*  the Red Egg parties (they were quite fun!),
a bit about Red Egg parties

*  Chinese New Year Kung Hei Fat Choy'ing
A bit about celebrating Chinese New Year

*  wandering around the MidLevels with my lantern (as a little kid) & into the teenage years, candles & lanterns in Victoria Park or on Repulse Bay beach
Photos of Mid-Autumn Festival
(as an aside, this a real favourite festival of mine)

(I had that exact rabbit lantern, the one she's holding, one year. AND I distinctly remember several of those fish)

all of it centred around being part of a family & jeez, I realise now, how cool that was.

The Brit side is there too. I also got to feel part of Royal Weddings (Charles & Diana's, I think was the first I really recall & set a precedent. I love an occasion, me.), Wimbledon, Christmases, BlackBerrying walks on the Downs in Sussex & freezing family swims (not me though. Noooooooo.  Roo don't do cold water swimming.  Thin tropical blood, see? but I DID watch The Cousins swimming) on shingle beaches, fish & chips & yearly family gatherings at my other grandparents' house.

How the mix manifests itself depends on the races involved &, a kind of genetic lucky dip. 

No one knows what feature from which side will step up & make an appearance. 

Tribe members will all have experienced comments like: "wow, really? but now you say I CAN see something" to the other end of the spectrum "how could anyone NOT see it?". 

Articles like this The Eurasian Nation & books like The Eurasian Face fascinate me.  I am really nosy to see how "the genetic legacy is etched" on others.  I like to think I can spot 'another one like me' with ease!

The only thing I don't enjoy are the people (utter strangers) who stare & stare, literally scratch their heads, can bear it no longer & ask me outright "Where ARE you from?".

This seems to be unique to this part of the world, with that undeniable tone "WHAT the hell are you? I need to know how I should treat you & I shall make that decision based on your race.  Damn you for confusing me".

It happens a lot at work. And infuriatingly, often in shops.  I have no interest in discussing my racial background in either of those situations.

I am no stranger to Discrimination. *pauses for dramatic effect*

People, I was beaten into 2nd place in  the Cussons Baby Powder Most Photogenic Baby competition (1970-something) by a Chinese boy baby.

I was robbed.
My Mummy & Daddy said so.* So it could only have been a race thing.  Right?

(I mean it couldn't POSSIBLY mean that I simply Wasn't, could it?)


It is a short hop from baby powder advertising to segregation on the backseat of a bus.

 * granted Mummies & Daddies are not always good judges of these things





I'll move on.
Globally, I don't think we are a minority anymore.  Not now.

There are loads of us Hapa brothers & sisters.  Some are my age but also, as our friends' families grow, new tribe members are swelling the ranks.
Hands up if you are a Hapa!!!!

WHY won't someone tell him?

Oh poppet.

Listen to me now:

That hair.  Is. Inexcusable.

Not this side of 1985.

I'm sure he is a sweet lad & by all accounts will be a formidable rugby player for the England in the future but, puhlease .......

....... sweetheart .......

...... what were you thinking?

 

An Unmade Bed at the Food Court United Nations

Yesterday, I dropped the Kid at his SOUTH AFRICAN school-buddy's birthday party.

Tried to be brave about the fact that I was in a mall & the 1st (BRITISH & IRISH) Lions test against AUSTRALIA was taking place.

BUT, it wasn't a dead loss.  I WAS in a mall during the DUBAI Summer Surprise Sales so, silver lining & all that.

Spent from a mere smidge of pre-holiday shopping, I rewarded myself with a monster skinny cappu (from Gloria Jean's, incidentally.  AUSTRALIAN.  Hoped that it wasn't a sign.  Remember, I knew nothing of the outcome of the afore-mentioned rugby match at the time) & some chips from McDs, for a spot of SRM (see Spontaneous Reading Moments post).

Sitting there, in my SRM bubble, with caffeine & carbs, I became aware of the family to my left.

A lone man, with 4 abaya'd ladies.  A baby in a buggy, 2 girl children (un-abaya'd) and an older boy child (playing on some handheld electronic device). 
I don't know but I guess it is possible that more than one of these ladies were his wives.  It's a thing that is part of life here.  I don't judge & anyway, they are all having a nice time sharing their mega Mac Attack meal.  THIS I get.

I glance around.  A positively psychedelic plethora of racial & cultural representatives are sharing the Food Court experience with me, on a weekend, one of the last before Ramadan.

There was a mainland CHINESE, maybe TAIWANESE, family, INDIAN families, LEBANESE families, families with their SOMALI, ETHIOPIAN, SUDANESE (I am toooooootally hazarding a guess here, you understand) helpers & FILIPINO families.

Just from where I am sitting I can see full abayas with burkas & hijabs all the colours of the rainbow http://www.hijab-styles.com/.

Hands up if you've ever spotted skintight trousers, gigantic boofy hair, killer heels & unnaturally inflated lips (& the rest!) in a mall in Dubai.  Honest to goodness, there is a whole table of them over there. 
Their children & maids are at the next table.

Maxi dresses, shorts & sleeveless tops are here too, alongside plenty of salwar kameez(s), men & women.  Is that the correct plural? 

Here too, in the KFC queue, the 'long shorts with flipflop' combo.  The weekend uniform of the standard male Western expat.

The crisp, utterly uncrumpled kandoras are modeled perfectly by a host of fathers, husbands & teenage boys.  HOW is that possible?

In 9 years I have never seen a dishdash in any form of disarray, whereas, whatever I do, I always look like an unmade bed.

Everyone is just doing their thing, not paying attention to anyone, except for the lady with a froffy coffee & a bag o'frites, scribbling on a napkin.

OK, need to stop staring.

Back to book.  Book about the fall of the BRITISH Raj in INDIA.

If I don't press on, I'll never find out how it ends & these chips aren't going scoff themselves.

 

Spontaneous Reading Moments (SRM)

You do what you gotta do & I have to grab my Reading Moments wherever I can.

Wow, how I relish the idea of an entire day(s) filled with nothing but the chance to sit & read.  BTW, just so's you know, this magical scenario will also have unlimited cups of tea and........ chips.  Deep-fried slices of potato.  Guilt-free, no judgement chips.

The above would make for a deliriously happy Roo.

However, until that particular level of Nirvana becomes available to me, I need to get my reading fix whenever opportunity presents.

Step 1 of Scratching the Booky Itch is: the book.

Gotta have a book.  With you. Clearly.

It's no good if your book lives solely by the bed/loo/wherever.


lunch

You never know when the chance will turn up.  The Moments pop out at you, unannounced. And, listen up soldier, YOU NEED TO BE READY.

There may be a Moment  waiting at the petrol pump. It may make itself known in a bank queue.  Perhaps you have arrived at a meeting early (see my post Greetings from The Future)?  Not to worry cos guess who is early too??

Yup, your little booky-friend.

Your wordy-pal may be in electronic form (yes, I have a Kindle) or 'analogue' (cover, front & back with paper & ink in between. The preferred option, for your information). 

Whatever.

Point is that one, or the other, is usually within reaching distance.  Always, in fact.  In my bag.
Have a look if you don't believe me. 
Can't leave home without one.
A Moment will turn up, GUARANTEED, if not.

And, there is NOTHING so torturous as the very worst unscratched itch, the *shudder* wasted Reading Moment.



By torchlight

And so, I shall share my SRMs - some will be tiresomely predictable (bedtime, waiting outside school etc) but I am hoping to record some more interesting ones as we go along.




Wednesday's school pick up


Where do you grab your SRMs?

The 'right' way to beat your child

Recently this 'parenting' book & its teaching has been brought to my attention.

http://www.amazon.com/books/dp/0966378601

Now the Scientist in me knows that I need to read this book for myself. 
Scientist Roo also knows that she need to spend more time researching & reading around the view points.

BUT, based on just the comments within the review section of the Amazon link, the Gut Instinct Roo is mortified at what this man is teaching people & what people think is ok.

From my initial research this man has no background in child psychology, child development, science or anything that I believe would qualify him to be telling people how to raise their children.

He has a BA in History & a Masters in Divinity & what I think is a Doctorate in Ministry (not sure.)

Here are some quotes from the book that I found on another blog:


p.134 “Acquaint your children with authority and submission when they are infants. This training starts the day you bring them home from the hospital.”

 p.142 “You must provide examples of submission for your children. Dads can do this through biblical authority over their wives, and Moms through biblical submission to their husbands.”


p.106 “Watch a baby struggle against wearing a hat in the winter. Even this baby who cannot articulate or even conceptualize what he is doing shows a determination not to be ruled from without. This foolishness is bound up within his heart. Allowed to take root and grow for 14 or 15 years, it will produce a rebellious teenager who will not allow anyone to rule him. The spanking process drives foolishness from the heart of a child. Confrontation with the immediate and undeniably tactile sensation of a spanking renders an implacable child sweet.”

p.151 Tripp describes the whipping procedure: take the child to a private place (so nobody can stop the abuse), make the child confess, tell the child "how many swats he will receive", put the child over your lap (as Tripp says, to "put the spanking in the context of your physical relationship" (!!)), pull the child's diapers or "drawers" down and whip them. Then pull the child up and show affection.


p.154 “When your child is old enough to resist your directives, he is old enough to be disciplined.



Rebellion can be something as simple as an infant struggling against a diaper change or stiffening out his body when you want him to sit on your lap. When our oldest child was approximately 8 months old, we were confronted with parenting our first mobile child. We had a bookshelf constructed of boards and bricks. Fearing the shelf would fall on him, Margy told him not to pull himself up by the shelf. After moving him away from the shelf, she left the room. As she peeked in on him, she observed him surveying the room. Not seeing her, he headed back toward the forbidden bookshelf. Here was a young child, not yet able to walk or to talk, looking to see if the coast was clear so he could disobey. Obviously, he was old enough to be disciplined.”




NGGGGGGGGGGGGGGAAAAARRRRRGGGGGGHHHHHHHHHHH!

 
I, personally, feel desperately uneasy with all of this - I want to explore WHY I feel so uneasy about this.

The position I am coming from with this:

* I am not anti-religion - far from it.  However, I believe whatever you believe is personal & I have
   no patience for tub-thumping.
   Extremist-Atheists are every bit as tedious & intolerant as extremist-Whatevers.  Believe in nothing
   or believe in the Great Pumpkin, I don't care. Just don't tell me that you have all the answers &
   everyone else is deluded/evil/blahblahblah
   I am very interested in learning about all sorts of faiths, beliefs, non-beliefs, conspiracy theories. 
   Love it. Want to learn all about all of it .......... WHICH IS HOW I FOUND THIS BOOK


*  I cannot say that I would never smack The Boy. 
    To date, we have never had to.
    But we'd never rule it out but, again, to date, we have yet to come across a scenario when we
    would feel it was
a) appropriate
b) would have taught anything or
c) that THAT course of action would have made whatever the scenario we were in, better.

* I have some, and I did not expect this to happen when I became a Mum, Tiger Mum tendencies.
   I have exceedingly high expectations in terms of behavior &, I have a strong commitment to
   emotional & social intelligence (personally, a work in progress for myself & my job is to help the
   Boy grow in that way as well)


And so, given all that, I'm going out on a limb here (back to that Tree-Hugger Roo perhaps) -

I do not understand, given alllllllllllllllllll we now know about Child Development, the Acquisition & Experimentation of & with Language, the importance of Exploratory Behavior in young children, Emotional & Verbal Expression & the importance those things have on growing Self-Confidence, honing Decision-Making & the making of good choice skills - how anyone can believe that unquestioning  submission to a biologically superior being (and this superiority may be reinforced by physical means if necessary) is ok.

We don't even believe it in dog training anymore*

I don't wish to cause any offence.  Not at all.  I just do not understand.




* a WHOLLLLLLLLLLLE other rant

UnReasonable Woman - dolphins & puppies

Don't be fooled.

I am not the mild-mannered easy-going tree-hugging Tree-Hugger you might have thought I was.

There are a few, just a few, things that will transform me into  .......

Angry & Unreasonable Woman.

(imagine The Hulk, with cankles & better hair)

"What are they?", I hear you cry, in unison.  "We need to know".

How lovely of you to ask.

Dolphins

Swimming with dolphins.
Dolphinariums.
Dolphins in captivity.

All of them.

Some have been born there, some need to be there as they are unable to be released but the VAST majority are WILD-CAUGHT, people.

AND most are kept in woefully inappropriate conditions for their astonishing mental abilities & requirements.

Don't kid yourself, numbnuts, a glitzy swimming pool is NOT what makes a dolphin smile.

Dolphins in Captivity - BornFree Foundation (please, at least, read pages 3 & 4 of this)

Swimming with Dolphins - BornFree Foundation

The very thing that makes us so drawn to them is the very reason as to why we shouldn't treat them in this way.

It is true many wild animals are kept in captivity - also in desperately inadequate, torturous conditions.  None of it is ok.
(sadly, in a professional capacity we have seen more kept poorly than well)


Facilities that keep wild animals in captivity (well, facilities of professional, moral note anyway) make Enclosure Design, Enrichment Programmes & the animals' living arrangements a priority to best to mimic natural living.


ie Cheetah Conservation Fund (the Founder of whom I recently had the privilege of meeting in person recently, does this is the most staggeringly proactive, effective way)

Pet Shops & Online Mail Ordering of Puppies

I'll keep this brief as I've worn myself out with the aggravation over the dolphins.

Two words.

Puppy. Farm.

Have google & decide whether that is something you want to get behind, 'cos that is what you are doing if you get a pup from either of those places.

In fact, I'll make it easy for you   Type 'puppy farm' into Google - this is what you get

NO decent breeder would sell any of their pups to an unknown fate.  They won't do it in the same country so, think about it. 
Packaging their 'product' off overseas?? Oh, for crying out loud.


What do YOU think their motivation is?
..................

...........................................

Annnnnnnnnnnd .......... breathe..............


I do want to end on a positive note so,

if you want to get a pup, here are some useful things to read:

http://bepuppyfarmaware.webs.com/gettingapuppy.htm

http://www.humanesociety.org/issues/puppy_mills/tips/buying_puppy.html

http://www.rspca.org.uk/getinvolved/campaigns/companion/getpuppysmart


(a small apology for the vehemence of this post but, my colleagues & myself see, first hand, alllllll toooooo often, the fall-out from the above 'industries' - sometimes, the steam has to find its way out.  Somehow)

Greetings from the Future

Interesting phenomenon this - every watch (digital or ....... whatever-you-call-not-digital) I've ever had, gains time.

Currently I am running at 20 minutes fast.

Mate (or we can go with 'Dude' for those across the water), I am, like, IN THE FUTURE!!

By 20 minutes.

********************************

Not sure when it crept up on me but, it appears that I have developed the eensiest whiff of an OCD thing.

I have, largely, taken myself in hand &, folks, please be assured that the whole New Newspaper/Magazine thing is over now.

More or less.  But, listen, that's another story.  Should you be desperate to know more....... Here. But remember, you asked!.

This Time Travel thing, though, is brilliant.

Whenever I think I am late, I'm not!
In fact, even better, I've got time to spare.
It deliciously liberating.

Hate being late.
Hate it.

NOW, I am revoltingly, sanctimoniously early.
Relaxed. 
Glowing with the (misleading) aura of efficiency & organisation that, on the surface, seems to accompany excellent time-keepery

My system puts me ahead of the rest of you lot by a whole 20 minutes.  It is joke in our house that everywhere in Dubai is 20 minutes away from wherever you are. 

This, then, puts me at my destination before I've even left.  Y'get me?

Oh, & in case you were wondering, I can report that the Future is reassuringly, same-same-not-much-different.

Except for that annoying Smug Girl sitting in the car, waiting for everyone else to arrive. 

The Rugby Post

Rugby can be a Friends for Life maker.
Ask any old rugby war horse, they'll tell you. 

Some of the  most enduring friendships ever made were made on the pitch. 
Well, actually off the pitch .............  I don't need to paint you a picture, do I?

Go to any rugby tournament, spot someone else wearing a jersey you recognise (club or country) - there's that imperceptible nod, a thread of connection.  And then you carry on, to the beer tent. Not always. But, let's face it, Usually.


Trousers said to me once, "Wherever you go.  If there is a rugby club, you'll find a mate. Well, at least someone to have a beer with."
He was actually lamenting how hard it can be, for men in particular, to make friends when you move country.  Unless you play rugby.

He has given up playing (see above 'Old Rugby War Horse' reference) & misses it hugely. 
His body doesn't though. 

His body has been yelling at the top of its voice "for Christ's sake!!!! Just LEAVE ME ALONE would you???

Me, I've alllllllways loved rugby.  Started at school, watching our school team (incidentally the same team that the Old Rugby War Horse started his campaign - although, back then, he was a fair-haired, mullet-sporting, think Crockett from Miami Vice, lanky thing).



Just thought you should see of the wavy hair I was referring to!

I think it is fair to say, we are a Rugby Household

So, it seemed logical that we should see whether The Boy would show any interest in it.

He had shown some vague interest when we had it on telly. 

Last October we were told of a club, Christina Noble Children Foundation's Arabian Knights, that had an Under 6 team.

First of all, & this will be the least 'rugby' thing you will ever hear me say ...... "SWEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEET"!!!!  Teeny weeny 5 year olds doing rugby. Gorgeous.

So, off we go to see what he thought of it all.  There was lots of  "well, if He doesn't like it, that's fine.  He doesn't have to like rugby".  We were adamant, there was to be nooooooo pressure.  None.  None at all.
Nope.  None.

In fact, we convinced ourselves it wasn't for him before he even got in the car. 

Turns out, it is.

Picking up an award at the end of his 1st ever rugby season

He loves it.  Whether he actually loves rugby or he loves playing with his rugby mates, remains to be seen.





But, he DOES love hanging out with the other teeny weeny rugby ponies (early rugby equestrian campaigners).








And here's the thing - a thing we did not expect ..... WE found ourselves in a team TOO!!!!?

Honest to goodness, without even setting foot on the pitch, the grown ups have seemingly formed a team of our own.
The kids are a great set of kids, by & large.  The parents, ditto.

It struck me when I mentioned to someone how late & strongly 'beveraged' our nights out with the other 'grown-ups'  have been.  "Yeah, well," was the response "Not surprising I guess, rugby people n'all that".

Funny how it hadn't really occurred to me but, yes, there WAS a high probability that people who would feel positive enough about the sport to encourage their children to do it WERE likely to have similar mindsets.

Expat Life CAN make it hard to make friends.  Sometimes the transient nature of expatdom makes it hard to form strong genuine bonds.  After a while, you kind of stop bothering.  The turnover of good friends made is unpleasantly high.  It is easy & often necessary to make lots of acquaintances but I suspect everyone recognises those connections for what they are.

But, good friendships with people who you are confident you'd be friends with, whatever country, whatever circumstance. Those can be hard to find, anywhere.

And so, it looks like rugby has done it again for us. 

It has brought us good people. Funny people. Fun people. Real people. Friend people.
The rugby season is over here in Dubai (40+ degrees C does tend to stop most things) but we are already looking forward to the start of the Arabian Knights' (now) Under 7s season.

Is it wrong that we are pondering the opportunity for a tour??????

I don't FEEL like a fake Mum.

"Parents, please educate your kids about adoption, so mine don't have to."
http://www.b_1711751.html

A brilliant article. Be great if you could glance at it.

In fairness to our family & friends (the lovely lovely people we choose to surround ourselves with) we have never felt uncomfortable or that any of you have ever looked at our family as being, oh I don't know, 'different'.  Never.

We've all got too much laughing & fun times & supporting each other through the ups & downs of Life to be focusing on or to be fussed about that old news.

What I DO take exception to, is our family being used as a "Learning Opportunity" by people on the periphery.  It HAS happened. 

I don't, for a minute, think this was meant as insensitively as it felt & I will admit there IS every chance that I have a chip on my shoulder about this stuff BUT still, bear with me. 

In this particular circumstance, it was clear that the mother had told her child he was going to meet an adopted child.  They talked about that, THAT aspect of Him before they MET Him??!!!! And THAT's, frankly, what pissed me right off.

Of course, kids will notice there is a difference between how The Kid looks & how We look.  But, y'know, I am a biobaby and I have 2 bio-parents who look completely different too. From me, from each other. 2 different races.  Meh. These days it is nooooooo biggie.

I appreciate that actually a proactive step was taken to discuss the subject of adoption with their child.  But, y'know, honestly, it really bothered me that by talking about it BEFORE our kids met, made it a thing their child focussed on as soon as he met Him.

We have no issue with people knowing (we can hardly hide it, so just as well) that our family came together via an adoption.

He WAS adopted.

He ISN'T adopted.

The adoption was a thing that happened more than 3 years ago.  It is how our family came together.  He & We are not defined by it.

He is our Kid.

We are his parents.

Oh & for your information:
*)  We haven't done a 'wonderful thing' (any more than any of you who had biobabies have &, btw, no-one feels at liberty to enquire HOW your children were conceived so, wind your neck in). 

*)  He isn't lucky.  We ALL are lucky (as you ALL are lucky) to have a happy healthy loving family.

As for 'do you know anything about his Real family?"

I suppose I need to get my response ready for this eventuality.

But, truly, I really don't feel like a fake mum.

May 2013 was the month when ...

* We, as a family, got charged at by a rhino, twice.  EXCITING :)






* The Kid went up a level in swimming ability AND reading levels.
* Also, He turned 6, had his first birthday party AND lost his 1st tooth.  Yup, same day.

* The Tooth Fairy visited us for the first time. See above.
  Turns out Chick possess underwater-diving apparatus & can, with ease, retrieve teeth lost 'in action'.  What a gal. Think Lara Croft with wings, & a snorkel.


* Myself & Horse tried our 1st half pass. Yeah, well .... this goes into the Work in Progress column ...)

* A sleepover happened (Never seen 'Tired But Happy' quite like it)

* I agreed to a mid-week Girls' Night (Unheard of. Certainly not this Century. Maybe earlier this Century but not recently. Anyway, you get the picture)





* The Great Dane peed on the carpet 6 times.

* The same Dane & Cat reached a new level in their relationship.






* Read & finished Gone Girl (10 days)


* I learnt some Hindi (please forgive phonetic spelling!)
     "Ram, ram. Kesa heh" Hi there, how are you?
     "Ram, ram. Kesa heh, mera dost" Hi there. How are you, my friend?
     "Mera choti betti" My beautiful daughter
     "Boudha cha" Very good
     "Shukria" thank you
The grooms (many from Rajasthan) at the yard dissolve at my attempts but I'm really enjoying learning.  I told them they must try to teach me to sound like a proper Hindi Lady.






* Trousers ALMOST went to HK to watch the 1st Lions game.  But, Duty called & instead, we will watch at home together :)

COME ON, LIONS!!!!!!!


http://www.bbc.co.uk/sport/0/rugby-union/22333575

* oh. Yeah, and I decided to give the blogging thing another go.  Can't say I am particularly pleased with anything I have done so far but, I AM enjoying the process.
Might stick it out a bit longer.